The Big Conversations are happening without you.
Your client saves the real conversation for whoever understands their business.
Last week I wrote about the gap between how you see yourself and how you actually show up under pressure. This week, the place that gap becomes visible to everyone but you: the client conversation.
Early in my career, in the mid-1980s, I was a mid-level manager at a major audit firm. The client was a major bank.On paper I was there to audit. I was soft-spoken, often hard to hear across a table, and not the obvious candidate for the room where the real decisions got made.
What I had was a real interest in the bank’s business. Not the audit of it. The business of it. How the bank thought about lending to whole countries, and what made one country a safe bet and another a risk. I read everything I could find. I asked questions that were about their problems, not my checklist from the firm. My own ideas of questions that needed some answering.
Within a year I was sitting with the bank’s chief economist, senior loan officers, and at times across from heads of state. Nobody promoted me into those rooms. They let me in because I could talk about the thing they cared about, in their own language, and I was not afraid to walk in and ask.
And to be sure, I was also thrown out of a few offices like that. A typical refrain would be, “You know nothing about this business. Please leave my office.” My usual retort was, “Of course I don’t know anything about your business, but I know mine.”
The leaders I coach are kept one level below the room they want
The senior people I work with at IT services and technology consulting firms are mostly held just outside the conversation they most want to be in. The client is polite. The work renews. Then the client wants to talk about where their business is heading, and they pick up the phone to someone else.
It is rarely about intelligence or effort. The difference is which language the leader speaks. A leader who talks about delivery, timelines, and scope is speaking the language of the work, and the client files that under “supplier”. A leader who can talk about the client’s market, their margins, and the choices their CEO is weighing is speaking the language of the business, and the client files that under “partner”. Partners get invited to the bigger conversation.
In 2026 the gap shows faster
Your clients are making real decisions about AI inside their own companies right now. They want a point of view from someone who understands their business, not a status update on the project. A leader who can only speak the language of the work gets left out of the exact conversation that decides next year’s budget.
This can be learned, and it does not take a new personality. I was the quietest person in most of those bank meetings. What got me in was curiosity about their world, and the nerve to bring it up.
One practice for this week
Before your next client meeting, write down one thing about the client’s business that has nothing to do with your project. Maybe a pressure their industry is under, or a bet their CEO made last quarter, or a number from their last earnings call. Bring it up early, with a real question attached. Then watch whether the conversation changes level.
You are testing one thing. Whether you have been speaking the language of the “work”, while the client has been waiting for someone to speak the language of their business.
If this lands, come find me on LinkedIn. I write about this most days, and my messages are open if you want to talk through what you are seeing in your own seat.
Raju Panjwani
Founder of Live Masterminds, Inc. | Former Managing Director at Morgan Stanley. He works with senior leaders in IT services and technology consulting, helping them see themselves more clearly and lead through what comes next.